of circumstance?
helplessly drifting
on life's stormy seas
to my present unenviable state?
Or
Am I a culprit
of all my indiscretions?
Is anyone truly
a master of their fate?
Should i therefore
be responsible for all that I did
and all that happened
to me?
Or
Should i shift the onus onto
fickle fate
and absolve myself of
all guilt and responsibility?
Is this action true and good
or only directed towards
the preservation of vanity?
the last shreds
of
my stressed-out sanity?
Delusions of grandeur
illusions of control
marionettes jerking along
to the haphazard
ministrations of life
we live love hate
in peace war strife
I loved someone once
I know I still do
I don't really know
if she loves me any more
we built an edifice
together
seemingly for eternity
it teeters and totters today
on cornerstones of
deception and miscommunication
repressed angst causing
incompatibility
how did this all come to pass
was it all in vain
how did we substitute
all our passion for pain?
we pay the price for our follies
of present and past lives
sentient energy beings
fleshed out to feel the knives
but
shouldn't understanding
bring forgiveness and peace?
faith in our
immortality
finally tame the beast?
maybe time will dull
this ache inside
deaden all feeling
quieten the tide
maybe all was a lesson
that was meant to be learnt
spreading myself too thin
recipe for fingers burnt
I know
there's a message
in there somewhere
enshrouded in the darkness
of loneliness laid bare
I'll look for it
in the ashes later.....
right now, I can't
as I'm deafened
by the pounding inside
and constantly blinded
by the incessant
tears in my eyes
too jaded
to move on
I try not to fall apart
look inside for the magic
hidden deep inside my heart
Forget the hurt and abuse
push away the pettiness
and rise above
I huff and puff
desperately
trying to stoke
the embers
of a once magnificent love
My soul
laid bare to the elements
nothing left to hide
Culprit or victim?
Who will decide?
